Uniting family

Uniting family

Why are most refugees men? This was a topic very often discussed between some of my Polish and International friends, and also what i read in many internet forums or in Youtube videos(maybe its time to stop reading negative news?).

Lately it has been cool to discuss about Islamyzacja Europy. Wherever You see there were banners saying amount Islamisation of Europe. All these refugees that come here are men. They are coming here to invade us. This is just like what happened a couple of centuries ago, when the Turkish empire tried to invade present Europe, and balkans.

What really struck me was, why there were only men? For once i thought, shit maybe this is an invasion. But then i started to think more and more about it. What is really happening?

Lets take a European, Polish couple. Whenever i see such a couple, i always see the man adoring his girlfriend, taking her for ice creams, movies etc etc. IN relationships in Europe, what i have always noticed is that, how much of a proximity the couples share with each other. Physical intimacy, and presence of the other partner is a huge factor in most of the relationships that I have seen in Poland.

lets imagine if a man was to go from Poland to Uk for work, most probably the woman would accompany him to Uk right? After all what are the chances that this relationship would work without the presence of both the partners?

Now I am not a refugee. But these refugees are coming to the promised land for something. Maybe i could try to answer a few questions for You?

I remember in the early 1980’s men would leave India(especially in Kerala) to work in the arab states. It was the time of mass migration to the wealthy arab states. There were a lot of men with finished college degrees in hand, but with no jobs. In order to get a promising wife, the only chance was to get a job, and make something out of Your life. 

After a few years, these men would come back to their state and marry an Indian girl. The advertisement on the marriage classifieds would normally sound like ‘ 25 year old christian man, MBA, job in Dubai, Financially well off. Looking for potential brides. Contact at this and this number/ address’’

If the groom was from Dubai, or the UK, it was much easier to get a Wife from a well off family. 

After marriage, most of these men would leave their country, back to Dubai, or Saudi Arabia, or whichever country they were working in, and wait another 2-3 years until they can take their wives back with them. It was acceptable.

Women in the meantime would get pregnant, and the husband will come every year to see his wife and kid. The only physical, emotional intimacy they had was for 10-20 days. After that the man had to leave India back to his job. Women didn’t complain. They would take care of the child, cook dinner, and do other household stuff, waiting for the right moment so that they too can leave with their husband.

After a few years, he would take his wife and kid and they would start a new life in the arab states. There are millions of Indian families living in the arab states. 

Lets say that a typical Indian family, has 1 son, and two daughters. It was always the duty of the son to earn bread for the family. It was obvious that he would first go abroad, and try to make a living. The girls in the family had to stay back and wait.(In Christian families women were much more empowered than Hindu, muslim families. Some christian girls leave earlier than males in the family to earn for the family.)

 Every month he would send money to his family back home, for the daily expenses of the family, for his sisters education etc etc. Even it is the job of the brother to make sure that he could buy enough gold, so that his sisters would get a promising husband.

Now I have a feeling that this is what is happening in the war torn countries. like Afghanistan, and Syria 

Countries likes Germany, and France, Austria are known for their rich economy, and state welfare system. Many of these young men who are coming from their war torn countries, are probably taking a huge risk. They would much rather leave their mothers, and sisters, and wives behind. I think it is either financially unviable, or too risky to take their family to Europe. 

I am just imagining. If I was living in a war torn country, with no access to education, and food. My brother and friends are getting ready to leave for Europe via boat. Will I leave with them for Germany? Hell Yes! Why not? Maybe not to misuse the welfare system, but at least to work.

I think if some of the refugees are able to find a decent job, and get settled in Europe, they would bring their families back here. I think that is their ultimate plan. I don’t think this is an invasion, but an economic opportunity for most of them. (In India or any other Asian country, Germany means technology, better standard of living, beautiful landscape, cool cars etc. Even a tea vendor knows that Germany is rich)

For Polish, or any other European it might look crazy. How can a man leave his wife and children in a war torn country like that? They are all crazy. Most of these men probably don’t even love their children, or wives.

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